Judg"mental"ism.

                “She’s such a happy and care-free person”. “He looks like a dropout”. “She has a big fat attitude”. “He seems rich”.

                We humans have a habit of assuming things. It’s so much sponged into us that we do it even unknowingly. The habit of judging others by their looks, behavior or personality, just by glancing at them, is very reprehensible. The funny thing is that we do this all the time but when someone else judges us by some miniscule things, then it sets our teeth on edge.

                A person deserves so much more than this. There can be a number of things hidden in them that we might not know if we don’t just assume. Nature, intelligence, maturity, insight and other vital aspects, which are actually necessary to understand a person, will only be mysteries. We may just miss out on someone because we judged them too fast.

                For example, there’s a girl; who is usually alone, either reading, thinking or listening to music. If she prefers the company of books and music to people, then it doesn't make her anti-social. It just defines her introverted nature. If people misunderstand it as being rude, then she would surely feel bad but she won’t do anything about it because that’s how she is. The point is people should talk to each other instead of being critical. If someone just asks her, then she can tell them that she likes to be that way, that is, quiet and alone. Only then they can know that she is not anti-social or rude. Being judgmental or assumptive is never the answer.

                Our own good or bad perspective judgments are alright as long as we don’t start thinking them out loud along with the crowd. Our negative judgments can also be out of some of our own insecurities which might regress us into getting a bad angle of others. Before forming a rigid opinion about someone, we should keep in mind that we don’t know their life story or what they are going through. We cannot just think about them on what we have seen, that is, the outer appearance. That is exactly like deciding to purchase a house without looking inside of it. A person with a whirlwind inside can fake a smile and joke around. A person with extreme happiness may not show it because it is his own little joy.

                We can always assume the body language but we can never get to know anyone without having an interaction. So, why waste that much time and energy thinking over what might not even be true? I would like to conclude with one of my favorite quotes by Eleanor Roosevelt:

‘Great minds discuss ideas.

Average minds discuss events.

Small minds discuss people.’

Happy birthday Suruchi!

          It’s my best friend’s birthday today and it could not have gone better. And I hope that she hopes the same. We had a girl’s day out. My friends, Suruchi, Priyanka and I, hit the roads to reach Powai. We spent the day driving, eating, laughing and enjoying the company of each other.
Since it was Suruchi's birthday I'd love to explain how much she means to me. I'm not exactly an outgoing and fun loving person. I can't just say about everything upfront. So here it goes, in writing.

          Suruchi and I have been friends for almost five years now and it still feels like it was just yesterday when we talked to each other on our first day of junior college. Those were some of the best days we have had. So many unforgettable memories. Our music obsession. There are just too many singers and bands to start with, so the word "music"! Our crazy MAGS group. The time when we were shocked to be not seen in the defaulters list. That scrapbook. There are just so many Little Things that I keep losing count.
           I'm very glad that I have a friend like you. I know, it may not seem like it (given my zones and I-am-a-lonely-person-so-don't-talk-to-me phase) but I don't know how much alone I would have felt if you wouldn't have been there with me at several times. The time when we were mesmerized after watching our Augustus in the movie theater, the time when we watched the Red Tour, the time when we were thralled during watching the Concert Film, the times when we knew how to convince the other after a petty fight, the time we started understanding each other like we had some telepathy.
          Happy Birthday, Suruchi. My fangirl, partner-in-crime, philosopher and the best friend I could ever had asked for!

What Makes Us Who We Are?

               People realize the value of things only when they lose it. We humans have the habit of taking things for granted. We are selfish, most of the times. We don’t care about anyone but ourselves. Sometimes, we don’t even care about ourselves and end up hurt. In that hurtful and sad state of mind, the philosophers inside of us act like the geniuses even we didn't knew existed. We develop theories. We do a thorough thinking over the pros and cons; right from causes to conclusions. And in that condition, we also accept all of our stupid acts and also realize that we should not have done those things or acted in an erratic manner. We also make promises to our inner self of behaving ourselves and not acting insensibly. We assure ourselves that we will never land up in such a scenario again.

                Matter-of-factly, we do behave disciplined for quite an impressive period. Follow the Bible of thoughts that we created and promised to ourselves. But, as time gradually passes, we go back to our earlier lifestyle. It’s like Déjà Vu for some of us who have done this process over and over again. What’s amusing is that we just push our disciplined selves into the most inner part of our minds like where the light never reaches the corner of a cave. Even though our conscience knows this, we ignore it the best we can and behave as if everything is perfect.

                This moment, the fight between the right and wrong versions of our minds, is the deciding factor. Hence, in fact, such small things are usually the big things that make us who we are. The things that make us a better person and help us understand what kind of humans we want to become. Such inner conflicts and a rendezvous with our real minds teach us a lot about our own nature. So, find yourself and have some hearty chats with the real You.